“A day in ‘the life’…”
DADT and Black Lesbians (Part 2)
via Lez-behonest.com

I served in the United States Marine Corps from the years 2001 to 2004. It was truly a journey that changed my life. At the time of joining, I didn’t realize what I was getting myself into…not to bring discredit to the Marines, I just didn’t realize how difficult life was going to be for me as a gay woman. At the time, all I was concerned about was stepping onto a career path. I had no idea that there was even such a thing as the “Don’t ask, don’t tell policy.”
With my own eyes, I saw charges drafted on Marines who were found guilty on homosexual acts. Due to the nature of the charges that I drafted and witnessed, I believe it would be a violation of privacy to go into detail. Therefore I will go into details of my own battles:
Everyone in my unit practiced a heterosexual lifestyle…well at least from what I saw. When I was stationed for a year in Okinawa, Japan, I was usually the only one who was just that..”the only one just chilling out.” I mean, I would go clubbing in clubs on Base, but that was really it. I couldn’t be myself. Then just being an “AG” or just an aggressive gay woman, I couldn’t dress the way I wanted to. And since I refused to dress in tight jeans and the works, I would dress like the male Marines. I also had to “tuck in” my shirt in my pants. We (Marines) are not allowed to walk around with our shirts “un-tucked” even if we were in civilian attire. The gay women in the Army were different; they could dress however hood they wanted..not female Marines. Why? Because Marines have these standards that set us aside from the others, not to mention we are the smallest branch in the U.S armed forces – hence the slogan: “The Few, The Proud, The Marines.” It is also important to note that only 20% of Marines are females.
After coming back to the U.S to my final duty station before receiving my honorable discharge, I spent about two years in San Diego California where I was a Legal Chief at the 12th MCD. There were times where I would just break down and cry because I couldn’t live like I wanted to. I would just go to work, the gym, eat and then back to my quarters. Then call my grandmother and my father and just complain. Thank God I didn’t have a roommate…it would just be too much bad energy for them to deal with. I was just unhappy. Why? Because I couldn’t be me. During events and functions even if I was interested in another girl, I couldn’t bring her to them, because that would be grounds for “disciplinary action” which could have resulted in an administrative separation as well as a general discharge.
My life was just empty…I couldn’t live freely. I felt like I was in a box and had to always creep just because I was gay in the military. Many people ask me after four long years why I left. It’s not that I left, it’s like I was forced to leave indirectly. I was a stellar performer and Marine..always on top of my game. But life as a gay female Marine wasn’t the business for me. You might probably hear people say, “but my home girl is in the military and she’s gay..they don’t give her no problems.” Really? Can she put her girl on her beneficiary package? Can she bring her to balls and functions like she would a man and hold her hands? No. The inability to do such has such a straining psychological effect, that it cannot be imagined. One has to experience to know. God forbid if you get caught in the “act,” yes you do face the possibility of being discharged under a “homosexual conduct.” And that’s exactly what your DD-214 or discharge certificate will read. I know, because one of my best friends who served in the Air Force that now lives in the Bronx received a homosexual discharge. When she told me about it, I said “Dude I’m so sorry you got that.” She said, “Johnson, I’m proud to have received it. Because I can show people that this shit is real.”
Had it not been for the restraints on homosexuality in the U.S military, I would have probably still been a part of it. But my life and being true to myself is what mattered most of all. Much love to the United Stated Marine; I will always be a Marine, but until this country accepts my lifestyle in such organizations, I refused to adapt but I did overcome the struggles that came with it all.
–
Alana M. J.
DADT and Black Lesbians (Part 1)
In the spirit of trying to portray real life, there was definitely a reason the character Tasha on the L Word was an officer in the military.
via The Grio.com Ending ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ will be a teachable moment for Black America
If you were watching President Obama’s first State of the Union Address on Wednesday night–and who wasn’t–one of the signature moments was when the president mentioned civil rights and the nation’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) citizens. “This year, I will work with Congress and our military to finally repeal the law that denies gay Americans the right to serve the country they love because of who they are. It’s the right thing to do.”
[...]
While there’s some dispute on the role of the Joint Chiefs at the speech, they were later seen enthusiastically clapping during Obama’s tough talk on Iran. According to the Servcemembers Legal Defense Network, the military is current discharging two soldiers per day under DADT. More than 13,000 members of the military have been fired since the law was adopted and more than “644 people have been discharged under the law since Mr. Obama took office,” the New York Times notes in a January 28 editorial calling for its repeal. The law has cost $1.3 billion. Additionally, the public face of the dismissed gay soldier is often white and male, but they’re statistically more likely to be a black lesbian or black gay man.
Census data show black women with same-sex partners serve in the military at 11 times the rate of women overall. The Pentagon reports black women are discharged under “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” at three times the rate that they serve. Black lesbians in the military are often mothers, the discharge means unemployment, loss of health care benefits for children, this is a real threat to the black family.
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As the Signs Turn – Aquarius

Yes! It’s that time of year again. My B-day is coming up on the 31st! As a year older and a year wiser, I’m thinking about what makes one “grown up”…yes, again. Lol. So I’ll spare you guys and link to this awesome post.
What makes you grown? This question had memories popping off left and right in my mind because I remember playing with toys, playing freeze tag, eating Bontons and watching Saturday morning cartoons never thinking in a million years that that part of my life would end. Even after high school I was still teetering on taking my little fast food job money and spending it on M to the E. And it all went to The Gap. Yet still it wasn’t bills that made me grow up fast…it was getting kicked in the heart by my first breakup…well that…and struggling to keep the lights and gas on in my first Apt. Made me grow like a WEED. So Get Togetha readers…. when did you realize that you were all growned up?–Get Togetha
Music I Like Vol. 6 — Nneka
via Lez-behonest.com
Just ‘google’ this chick. You will get tons!

Nneka’s been on European charts since ‘05. Of course being in the U.S. I hadn’t heard of her until just now…better late than never! She’s freakin’ amazing (besides being cute–hehe), and her voice is beautiful! Basically people are saying she’s the next Lauryn Hill, and honestly I think she’s got it. I already love “Heartbeat” and “The Uncomfortable Truth”Even though Nneka sings more than raps, she names hip hop as her primary musical root and most important source of inspiration, while citing artists such as Fela Kuti and Bob Marley as well as contemporary rappers Mos Def, Talib Kweli, Mobb Deep, and Lauryn Hill as key influences in her own pursuit of musical recognition.
Feb. 2 marks the release of her debut stateside album, Concrete Jungle.Tune in to “The Late Show with David Letterman” the following night to catch Nneka’s U.S. late night television debut.–Pollstar
A New Year
Yes, I left you all hanging…bad me! (Thanks to everyone for their comments since I was away! Lets me know ppl still bother to come here, haha.) I hope everyone has had a great New Years so far. I’m back from my three and a half week vacation! You know as much as I want to be done with school (this is my FINAL semester!! Count down to graduation: T-minus 16 weeks and counting!!), I’ll miss the looong weekends and breaks. The real world doesn’t allow such things unless you’ve accumulated some serious sick days and vacation time, lol.
I spent the holiday with my Fam in H-town, which was great since I won’t see them again until late March. I’m a bit disappointed in myself since I will have to take some classes over again. I was so absorbed with a lot of nonsense last semester. One lesson I learned in ‘09 was that the only person holding me back is ME. I kept telling myself ‘I can’t do this…’ or ‘I can’t do that’…when it was all in my head. My mindset prevented me from doing a lot of the things I wanted to do, and I’m talking about beyond school towards other issues in my life.
It’s a New Year, heck a new DECADE, and I can’t let me hold ME back. I’m at a crossroads now where I could potentially go in any direction in my personal or professional life. My biggest decision is: where do I want to live after I’m done with school? Of course the job market has some say, but should I stay here, go home, explore a totally new city (ATL…hint hint)? I’m not sure what exactly I’ll be doing after graduation. I want to become an Art Director, and I’ll have to figure out how to go from Economics BS degree to the arts…I’m thinking about using Marketing as a bridge. What ever I do, it has to go in a direction that I think will fulfill me. I say “think” because people change their minds so often. I can only work with what I know now.
So thanks everybody for reading. Here’s to 2010~

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